What do you do when you feel like cutting?
What do you do when you feel like crying?
What do you do when you feel so much loss?
What do you do when you can't pay the cost?
I think all the sadness is hitting me today. It's not like any other day except my feelings are strong and my ability to navigate out or through them is not as clear. It's as though I have a train in front of me and I'm trying to push it back so I don't get run over. Trampled and crushed. Flattened and dead.
There is no light at the end of the tunnel today.
Only rocks and stones and darkness and cold.
Raging thoughts, hurricane feelings and tornado sirens in my head.
Sirens or signs? Winds or insights? Water or hope?
I don't know yet.
