Dear Heavenly Father,
That question is floating around in my head at this early hour of the day. Why am I here? On this earth, at this time in history, with a body that is broken down, a mind that is not as sharp as it was two years ago, a spirit that wanders in the darkness looking for a beacon of light, a young child wanting to be comforted from all the hurt and sadness she feels inside.
Why am I here? I study my face and see the deep brown eyes, the clear complexion, the shape of my eyebrows and nose, my lips full of color and my hair with strands of gray but still mostly brown. My facial features can show the weathering of a long cold winter where sorrow sleeps or it can show a smile where hurt is underneath. It can avoid people's eyes or it can meet them with great confidence. But still I ask...
Why am I here? To need you, to please you, to serve you, to honor your name.
Why do I feel so empty inside? Numb, wanting to drink away the feelings when they start to surface, sleepless, medicated, bad body.
Turned off the switch.
