Often times when my emotions are running raw, my heart is divided. It's being pulled and stretched in different directions. There is one of two things happening. Either I'm growing or I'm being disobedient. I like to think I'm growing but there have been times when disobedience has reared its ugly head, causing more pain than was necessary.
But was it more than necessary? Sometimes I wonder if God lets us wander out into the desert so we can get full of sand, parched and thirsty for His water so we become more and more familiar with His kind of learning. So we can recognize it's attributes quicker, sooner and not so painfully.
That's my prayer for today. That the raw emotions I feel lead me to a place of obedience, not to a place in the dry desert where I wander for days uncertain of my destiny, parched and burning for certainty. Where the hope I see is not a mirage but a mirror of my Savior who is waiting for me with a cold bucket of ice water and a cold towel for my head. Shade in the form of a tent and a camel to take us home.
